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Cheeseburger Party 2007... Back when we were all so young and innocent.
Once upon a time, a group of women decided to invite everyone they met at BlogHer 07 to their hotel room. They sweetened the deal with two bags of McDonalds cheeseburgers, two bags of fries, and a few bottles of wine. With so much to offer, the party quickly got out of control. Security was called. Photos were taken. A Cheeseburger Party legend was born.
This year, my new BFF Isabel Kallman actually offered to sponsor the Second Annual CheeseburgHer Party. Isabel owns and maintains the awesomely awesome Alpha Mom site, which you should visit over and over again until you've worn the fingerprint grooves off your digits and your eyes are bleeding. The eminently generous and kind Isabel bought boxes and boxes of wine for the CheeseburgHer Party, along with 200 MCDONALDS CHEESEBURGERS and 150 ORDERS OF FRIES. It was a Cheeseburger Party ON STEROIDS.
Thanks, Isabel!
News of the CheeseburgHer Party spread far and wide. Yvonne and I received thousands of e-mails, text messages, phone calls, smoke signals from people wanting the details. We gave them out to all, because this was a PARTY FOR EVERYONE WHO LOVED CHEESEBURGERS. Or FRIES. And that's pretty much EVERYONE. People began arriving thirty minutes before the party even started, and proceeded to make merry.
Dutch Blitz, out of control.
Dutch Blitz, out of control.
It wasn't long before the tiny suite was filled to capacity with grown women and men, all wearing McDonalds bags on their heads. Pictures were taken. Alcohol was imbibed. Cheeseburgers were eaten. Craziness ensued. And every thirty seconds or so, another elevator door would open and a dozen more people would show up, determined to have their cheeseburgers. And eat them, too!
Gettin' jiggy with the McDonalds hats!
Chris Jordan!
Bossy!
Her Bad Mother and child!
Yvonne and Amalah!
Stephanie Klein!
Gettin' jiggy with the McDonalds hats!
Chris Jordan!
Bossy!
Her Bad Mother and child!
Yvonne and Amalah!
Stephanie Klein!
We knew things were getting out of control when it was announced that "Someone from Obama is coming up!" I'm not even kidding, y'all. One of Obama's people showed up and began handing out stickers. The suite at this point was completely filled. Like sardines. This is a view from the hallway.
OMG
OMG
That's when things really got crazazy. A naked man came out of his room to see what the fuss was about. A woman down the hall opened her door and yelled, "What the FUCK IS GOING ON?!" And then it happened. The moment we'd all been waiting for dreading.
Security!
Security!
"If you do not all leave immediately, this guest will be EVICTED!" they bellowed. Everywhere, people in McDonalds hats laughed and kept talking. Meanwhile, Yvonne tried to talk the guards down.
"We're just writers, sir!" she assured them.
"We're just writers, sir!" she assured them.
It was no use. Mercilessly, they forced men, women and even babies to leave the premises. Those who wouldn't leave? Were tased. It was time to pull out all the stops. I pleaded with the guards to leave my friends alone. "We're just friends, trying to enjoy cheeseburgers together!" I said, on bended knee.
"Please, sir! Show us mercy! (Thanks for the picture, Tori!)
Isabel even brought out cupcakes...
But Kamel wasn't budging. Heartless!
"Please, sir! Show us mercy! (Thanks for the picture, Tori!)
Isabel even brought out cupcakes...
But Kamel wasn't budging. Heartless!
Our cheeseburger party was over, a mere 45 minutes after it had begun. Which meant that everyone ate cheeseburgers and fries in the far-more-spacious lobby, so... No big deal!
And that, my friends, is the story of the Second Annual CheeseburgHer Party. I can't wait to see what the next year will bring.
And that, my friends, is the story of the Second Annual CheeseburgHer Party. I can't wait to see what the next year will bring.
61 comments:
You guys are cracking me up. I will be at the party next year. I am vowing it to you now :) No more excuses :)
PLUS! The homeless men and women of Union Square got the leftover food.
How could they even think of evicting such do-gooders!
I think it is AWESOME that you invite everyone, even if it is only for 45 minutes. That's what BlogHer should be about!
My roommates didn't see the naked man (we were in the room next to him) but I saw plenty.
And we never did get a cheeseburger...
Steph
That is 80 shades of awesome! You all looked so beautiful! I miss you all! *sob*
hilarious! I wish I'd been there to witness the atrocities.
No man is going to have enough guts to say what I am about to, but every man is thinking the same -- this is the sexiest thing that anyone has ever seen on the internet. Hot women. Cheeseburgers. Can there be any better commercial for McDonald's? I'm going for a Big Mac right now.
Honestly, that photo of Isabel with the cheeseburgers should be on billboards. No one will ever care about the nutritional value of these burgers again.
I will so be there next year. I'm eminently qualified to eat cheeseburgers and fries.
I got there about 27 seconds before security. Luckily, Bossy started the Underground Cheeseburger Railroad and I managed to get one down in the lobby.
Those 27 seconds before security arrived, however, were pure bliss.
Seriously, you offered security cheeseburgers and sweets and they still wanted to evict you, something is wrong wrong wrong with them. :)
I'm back to having BlogHer envy.
Looks like you had a great time till the fuzz arrived.
BTW why is the guard holding his nose in that one photo?
I'll bet this is the first time any man has been able to resist you!
What kind of wine do you pair with a mcdonalds' cheeseburger?
Woodbridge Chardonnay, duh.
So this was what everyone was Twittering about. I'm sorry I missed it.
I was so disappointed I wasn't coming this year, because last year's cheeseburger party was awesome. It looks like you upped the ante again - so next year? You bet I'm coming.
I'm crying, Linds! CRYING!
Also, this may be the funniest thing I've heard yet. "the Underground Cheeseburger Railroad"
hah hahaha
Thank you to everyone who should up. You made our entire weekend.
That is a seriously crazy photo of me, and I can't even blame it on being drunk. I'm just plain weird.
It was fantastic to meet you, and to be a part of the great Cheeseburger Party of '08. I'm looking forward to '09 already!
THIS WAS THE FUNNIEST THING I'VE EVER READ/SEEN. I am laughing so hard. This is incredibly hysterical. Thanks for documenting the craziness and sharing with us all!! LOVE IT!
Y'all gals most definitely know how to party. "We're all just writers, sir" my arse.
Next year, presuming BlogHer's not in my home town, where I have a kiddle or two waiting to be tucked in, I will so be there.
One has to ask, of course, whether George Clinton was in the house ("Do Fries Go with that Shake?").
That's classic! All you need is a PETA protest outside your door. Oh well, there's always next year!
CheeseburgHer 08 ended way too quickly...i mean, i got to eat my weight in McDonald's and red velvet cupcakes (mmm...cupcakes) and then sport the hat...but how did i manage NOT to meet you?
Damn security guards. I'll bet they were VEGETARIANS! LOL!
Looks like it was a blast while it lasted. :)
Looks like SO much fun! Maybe one day I'll get to come and eat a cheeseburger. I love that the security guards were good natured about it.
The Afterparty Cheeseburger party, conducted in complete silence while swigging wine and snarfing burgers, was also fun. We felt like undercover burger eaters, which sounds sorta porny.
OMG! Hysterical.
Thank you for allowing me to be part of all this awesomeness and thank you all for coming to the party. It was a blast while it lasted and the memories & laughs are priceless.
God! I am going to start blogging just so I can attend BlogHer! Well, maybe if it had been In&Out Burger....
Cheeseburgers just aren't as good without a naked man and security guards. How WILL you top it next year?
Oh wait, I know---I'LL be there! ;)
Well, ding dang. Next year I better try to wramgle myself an invite, huh?
I have found your blog through one of my personal favorites, Jennster! I don't even have a blog, but I want to come to BlogHer just to meet and party with you rockstars!
Ahh best story ever. I love the begging photo. :P
Hilarious! You ladies are so full of silly. I <3 it. Hope to join you all some year....
I was there for all of about 10 minutes before it got shut down. It was an amazing cheeseburger, red velvet cupcake and wine filled 10 minutes though!
I am so desperately sad that I arrived back at the hotel just as 8 million bag-wearing cheeseburger lovers flooded the lobby looking for a new spot for their McRave.
Okay, it is NOW that I wish I was there with you. Nothing like security breaking up the bash... The photo essay was priceless. Those heartless cheeseburger hating bastards!!!
I was so damn happy that after 33 years on the earth, I was FINALLY at a party that was broken up by security!
OMG how hilarious! So much craziness going on, I'm going to have to go next year. I'll be the chick that brings her own veggie burger. :)
Amalah AND Stephanie Klein AND cheeseburgers? Beyond jealous.
Hubs: "How was San Francisco?"
Me: "I got thrown out of a CheeseburgHer Party!"
Hubs: "Was it worth the trip?"
Me: "Every penny!"
I'm just glad I got there right before security did...oh...and to have gotten the last of the fries ;o)
those pictures are priceless. the cheeseburgher party looks like it was the most fun event of the whole conference!
At least the security guards have a sense of humor!!
Neil, I couldn't disagree more...a lot of men have the courage to say exactly that! BlogHer babes and cheeseburgers...all that was missing was football to make it perfect ;)
Lindsay, that was hilarious.
Best BlogHer wrap post. And I've read a lot of them.
"We're just writers sir" ROFL
Oh my god...after look at those pictures I *really* want a cheeseburger!
I maintain that this was the best party of BlogHer and not just because I ate an entire bag of french fries. (Not, um, the little one-measly-serving bag.) (A full-size bag stuffed with at least 10 one-serving portions.) (Then I put the large bag on my head and pulled out the JAZZ HANDS.) (If anyone didn't get fries, I'm sorry.)
Did I tell you we got kicked out of the LOBBY too? Two (different) large men came over to where we were sitting on the floor after an hour or so and the larger of the two said "Can't find any chairs?" And I said "no," and he said "CAN'T FIND ANY CHAIRS?" and I said "NO!" and Sean said "Uh, I think he wants us to leave." So we left. Begrudgingly. Those guys weren't half as nice as Kamel. Also, they were bigger. It was time to move on.
Fantastic story.
Sorry to disappoint. I'm not an Obama person in any respect other than that I support him enough to get a bunch of stickers and had them out, especially when there is a crowd of people around.
OK, seriously, the moment Isabel walked out with the cheeseburgers on a wooden tray I was over the moon for her. Nevermind that the entire time I was in that room I was laughing so hard I couldn't eat a cheeseburger one. And then for an hour afterward I lovingly carried around my hat. So awesome.
Yeah, Simon, I heard someone else from the campaign was there... Thanks for the stickers, though!
Ok. So next year, McDonald's should totally donate the burgers and fries, because this is AWESOME advertising. I just got a major burger craving looking at that. And, being pregnant, you KNOW it will be satisfied.
Must go harass my husband now...
Ya know, that comment by Neil got me thinking... next year you should just get McDonald's to sponsor the whole damn party.
ahahaha I've got photos of us hidin' out in the bathroom. Good times!
I ate three of them. No, wait: FOUR.
Am lactating.
OMG, I'm so touched!
I LOVED meeting you too. You've been such an inspiration to me while starting to blog. Thanks for putting so much of yourself out there for all of us to read.
I'm still decompressing from my first Blogher experience, but will be posting in the next day or so.
I'm absolutely attending this party next year!
You're Fabulous Dahling!
I just realized that is my shnoz interrupting your awesome pic of Chris Jordan and cheeseburgers. Oops! Sorry about that.
So glad I got to go!
That pic of Y and The Face and "we're just writers" made me almost shoot my drink out of somewhere. GAH. You guys crack me up. :)
lol. Our room was down the hall, 1111, and we could hear you guys having a blast. If I wouldn't of had to get up at 3:30 to make my flight back home I would have totally been there.
Shannan
Sooo funny! LOVE it!
omg hahahah this is awesome!
This sounds like way too much fun! Can't wait!!
OK, this explains a lot.... a lot!:)
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